Eventually, Talk of Tiger Woods Turns to the  Yankees

So there I was on Saturday night, having dinner at Sly’s Restaurant in Carpinteria, eating the best meal in Santa Barbara County, maybe even in the entire state of California. (Yes, it’s that good. If you’re ever in the area, do yourself a favor and order a steak, some mashed potatoes, their famous hot fudge sundae, anything on the menu. Chef James Sly and his wife Annie will make the experience a memorable one, trust me.)
My husband and I were joined in our food and wine gluttony by literary agent Angela Rinaldi and Joseph Parent, the author of “Zen Golf,” “Zen Putting” and “Golf: The Art of the Mental Game.”
Joseph is a pro golfer’s pro who’s worked with champions like Vijay Singh and many others. The truth is, I couldn’t care less about golf. I never play it, never watch it, never read about it…..except that I’ve been glued to the Tiger Woods story. Why was he leaving his house at 2:30 in the morning? What made him drive onto a neighbor’s property? How come his wife supposedly came running out with a golf club and smashed the car window? Inquiring minds want to know what was going on with those two.
I tried to worm some information out of Joseph, but he was maddeningly discreet. I was about to give up on him as a dinner conversationalist when he said, “Oh, by the way, how about the Yankees?” I immediately reached into my handbag and whipped out the She-Fan Cam. (You never know when you’ll meet up with a Yankee fan, so it’s important to have it handy at all times.) I told Joseph to get ready for his close up and he put on his Mr. Magoo glasses and here’s our interview.


  1. 5dwright5

    Really love reading your articles. You have talent. I also have an offer for you though. Don’t take this as spam or anything, but I have a baseball forum going on right now, and would love for you to join and share your articles etc. We also have a writing team going on where your articles will be posted on bleacher report etc.

    URL is http://baseballhaven.net/index.php register and post around etc. If you are interested in being on the writing team, PM The Brew Crew. Have fun on the site as well.

  2. mel.tmottbg@gmail.com

    You are always prepared to get the interview! I found Joseph’s comment about not needing an ace, but a fourth starter, very interesting. Yankee fans tend to think we need the best of everything all the time. But getting a solid fourth starter (providing Andy comes back) makes a lot of sense.


  3. cheshirecat9

    You’re smart to always have your She-Fan Cam with you Jane, you always seem to run into Yankee fans! My sister is visiting me this weekend and we just took a tour of Yankee Stadium. It was awesome. We saw the Museum and Monument Park, both of which we had been to before. But then we got to go into the dugout. It was surreal sitting in there. Right through a set of double doors exiting the dugout are two batting cages. There is also a small refrigerator that still had two cans of whipped cream in it. Then we got to go into the clubhouse and that was just too cool to describe.

    The tour was about an hour and definitely $20 well spent. We’ll send you some pictures when Courtney can download her pictures.

  4. Jane Heller

    Glad you like my posts, 5dwright. Your baseball forum sounds like fun, but I’ve got my hands full these days. Thanks anyway.

    I had the same thought after listening to Joseph’s video a second time, Melissa. We really don’t need another “ace,” as much as I love Halladay and believe you can never have enough pitching. What we need, as he said, is a #4 starter. Of course, we want a GOOD #4, not some Sidney Ponson type!

    Oh, goodie, Paul. I will head over. I think we’re supposed to hear some sort of statement – or the release of the 911 tape – today.

    How cool that you and Courtney took the Stadium tour, Cheshirecat. I would LOVE to sit in the dugout and imagine myself hanging out with the boys or telling Joe to make a lineup change or something. Will look forward to pics.

    Right, Peter. Of course he forgot his club. What else could it be? LOL. Maybe he has his own personal driving range and they turn on the lights just for him.

  5. bgalaxy@verizon.net

    i on the other hand say you can never have enough good pitching. i would love to have halladay. first off he’s amazing. second off if we don’t get him, he could go to the red sox and then we’re in trouble. third, pitchers get hurt so you can never have enough. bring on halladay.
    i loved the comment about the yankee stadium tour and seeing cans of whipped cream. my favorite sign of the post season was we want pie.
    anybody else thinking of bob shepard’s announcement of his retirement? i know he hasn’t been well and hasn’t been around but since i sometimes hear him in my head, i have a fondness for him.

  6. Jane Heller

    The “you can never have enough good pitching” argument is always a worthy one, Barbara, and I think Cashman feels the same way. And trading for Halladay is one way to prevent the competition from having him. That said, if Andy comes back and either Joba or Hughes transition well into the rotation, do we really need another ace at the cost of giving up either Joba or Hughes and possibly Montero or Jackson? I’ve been a huge fan of Halladay, as you know, so I’m surprising myself by even asking these questions. I was sad to hear that “The Voice of God” was retiring, even though I figured he wouldn’t be back. I was at his last game in September of ’07 and I remember being concerned when he wasn’t there after that. But at 99, he deserves a little R&R.

  7. Jane Heller

    Oh, I bet you could find a few Jeter haters, Jeff. He does get booed in many ballparks. But maybe the boo-ers are those who secretly love him.

  8. mel.tmottbg@gmail.com

    There is the “never enough pitching” side of this. And Halladay is great. Wonder what will happen with Wang? I’d love to see him come back and win 20 for the Yankees.

    I’m sad about Bob Sheppard, but what a great run he had!!!!

    I’d like to take the tour sometime myself. Sitting in the dugout would be amazing.

    “27th Heaven” must be 3 times as good as Cloud 9.


  9. Jane Heller

    I’ve been wondering about Wang too, Melissa. I’m afraid the Yankees have lost interest in him or maybe it’s just because the media hardly mentions him. Even if he does come back, he won’t be game ready for awhile, and we’ll need another arm in the rotation. Whose arm? I’m dying to find out!

  10. raysrenegade

    Look out for 5D. He also hit me up today (lol).

    I still like the off-the-cuff comment coming out of Central Florida that he had find a jeweler to get a “Kobe Special”.
    We hear so many bad thing about Nanny’s or ex-Nanny’s going wild, hopefully it is a minor thing and not a major distraction for either of them.
    But, I am so glad you have a extraordinary culinary delight.
    Always special when you can get out and experience something that makes your tummy tingle with glee.

    Rays Renegade


  11. Jane Heller

    You’re so right about 5D, Renegade. I think he’s been all over MLBlogs today. (But he’s not spamming. Sure.) I wonder if that “Kobe Special” comment was true. If so, I think a lot of athletes are visiting their local jewelers. LOL. My sister just emailed that her daughter, my niece, went to school with Tiger’s alleged mistress. It also turns out that this woman’s husband died on 9-11. On a happier note, my dinner at Sly’s was so good I’m still thinking about it. I couldn’t eat like that every night, but for a special occasion it was awesome.

  12. jessel

    Jane, always a delight to read your stuff. When I hear that Eldrick (that is is his real cognmen, you know) is posting explanations on his website, but can’t find time to speak to the local gendarmes, two thoughts spring to mind. One, the celeb/athlete has consulted a lawyer. Two, no one ever got cited for perjury for issuing a press release.

  13. raysrenegade

    Thinking more of the Tiger situation.
    Maybe he is having the same as Ty Webb in “Caddyshack”.
    He has developed a passion for “night putting”.
    I guess it could be worse.
    He could of got caught playing the 19th hole.
    (Bad pun)

    Rays Renegade


  14. Jane Heller

    Jessel, I’m sure Eldrick (love it) has consulted lawyers, agents, publicists, you name it. His every move seems very calculated so as not to a) give any more information than absolutely necessary and b) not implicate his wife c) not lose any endorsement contracts or status. It doesn’t look as if he’s going to provide any further information.

    Night putting. That’s it, Renegade. Of course, if the National Enquirer is to be believed, he did get caught playing your bad pun. LOL.

  15. jessel

    Jane, glad you liked ‘Eldrick’. But sorry about messing up cognomen as cognmen. Shows what happens when one tries to get a little too florid. I read Tricky Dricky’s comment that the matter was private, it involved an accident, no wrong occurred and he won’t do it ever again. If nothing wrong happened why promise never to do it again. And if the incident was purely an accident, how could he hope to keep such a promise. Seems like there is still some splanin’ to do.

  16. Jane Heller

    All good points, jessel. He definitely has some ‘spaning’ to do. And don’t ever worry about florid writing. It’s fun to read!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s