As has been widely reported, the Yankees didn’t offer anybody arbitration – not a single free agent. Who’s hurt and confused? This man.
He can’t figure out what he did to deserve such treatment. It was one thing for the Yanks to pass on Mussina (retiring), Giambi (deteriorating), Pudge (shrinking), Pettitte (demanding), and Pavano (hahahahaha). But Bobby?
“WHY ME?” he said when he heard the news, his wail oddly similar to that of Nancy Kerrigan’s.
Brian Cashman had this response: “We wanted to make sure we controlled the amount we’d be spending.”
What????? Did Cashman accidentally think he was the G.M. of the Pirates?
“The Yankees are engaged with Abreu,” he added, indicating that there is still a desire to bring the right fielder back for another year.
Really? That’s not what Abreu’s agent said. “We haven’t heard from them once since the end of last season. And to be honest, Bobby isn’t happy about it.”
Uh-oh. I sense a “He said/He said” here. Clearly, somebody is misremembering. Is it Bobby? Or Cashman?
All of this reminded me of the other “He said/He said” confrontations we’ve witnessed over the years. Baseball alone has had its share of them.
For example, there was this man insisting that he shot lots and lots of naughty substances
into the body of this man, who pledged that he was the one telling the truth, even though he didn’t exactly come out and dispute anything.
More recently, we had this man maintaining that he injected those same naughty substances into the gluteus maximus
of this man, who vehemently denied the allegations, except the one about his wife’s gluteus maximus.
And who could forget the testimony of this man, limo driver Alan Park.
He stated that his client told him he didn’t answer the buzzer at the house on Rockingham because he had overslept. But then the client himself
asserted that he hadn’t been napping, not even for a second. Which one were we supposed to believe?
And in still another “He said/He said” involving a celebrity and a limo driver, we had this man
telling prosecutors he heard his client mumble: “I think I killed someone.” The big-haired client, on the other hand,
accused the limo driver of lying misremembering.
Finally, in perhaps the most famous case of all, we have this man announcing: “There’s a cancer growing upon the presidency.”
To which this man replied: “I am not a crook!”
Which is my roundabout way of saying I went to a screening of the movie “Frost/Nixon,” which opens in limited release on Friday. It’s amazing. Frank Langella plays Nixon to perfection, and the story is told with wit and suspense. Go see it, even if you’re too young to remember Watergate.
Here’s the trailer.