Swish Meets the New York Media, Sort Of

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Just who is Nick Swisher anyway? In this picture he looks like a country singer minus the cowboy hat. The longer I stare at him the more I expect to hear Kenny Chesney wailing about his two-minute marriage to Renee Zellwegger.
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If I seem a little mournful myself, it’s because I am. Did the Yankees really need yet another first baseman (hyphen) outfielder in the manner of Morgan Ensberg and Shelley Duncan? Haven’t we had enough players with hyphens? And that doesn’t even include Posada, our first baseman (hyphen) catcher, or Giambi, our previous first baseman (hyphen) designated hitter. Which is why I still want him.
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Meanwhile, Nick did a long-distance conference call with the beat writers today, and my first impression after listening to the audio posted on Peter Abraham’s blog was: He uses the word “man” a lot. As in: “It’s an honor to put on the pinstripes, man.” And: “Every little kid in America dreams of playing for the New York Yankees, man.”
Memo to you, man: We’ve heard this kind of thing before.
My favorite part of the conference call wasn’t when he said, “Mr. Cashman seems like a wonderful gentleman,” even though it was hilarious the way it made Cash seem 100 years old. And it wasn’t when he said, “It meant the world to me that A-Rod called to welcome me to the team,” despite the fact that I choked up. It was when, after one of the writers mentioned how he had bounced between four different positions last year, Pete Abraham asked, “Is first base your best position, Nick?” And Nick said – I kid you not – “Defensively, yes, although I really haven’t had an opportunity to play there much.”
Excuse me? We signed you to play first base and you haven’t played there much? 
As I indicated, I still want him.
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Oh, well. Since Nick is now a Yank, I suppose I should take a closer look.
The son of former catcher Steve Swisher, he was raised in the boring-sounding town of Parkersburg, West Virginia by his grandmother, Betty.
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He wasn’t the most famous native of Parkersburg.
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Patsy Ramsey was.
He went to Ohio State, excelled in baseball and got signed by the A’s where he fit right in with his long hair and Giambi-ish personality.
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He even copied Giambi’s batting stance.
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Known for his easygoing style and dedication to charities, he did engage in the occasional brawl.
swisherducksfight101.jpgActually, he kind of ducked that punch from Rangers’ pitcher Vicente Padilla, and the incident got him so unhinged he had to be restrained.
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His next gig, with the White Sox, didn’t go so well.
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He only batted .219 last year. (No, that’s not a typo.)
He did an interview with Chicago Magazine in which he admitted to being a bit of a party boy. He said, “Having fun and laughing works best for me.” If he’d only known that having fun and laughing is just not the Yankees Way.
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He went on to say, “My style is a little bit rocker.” Did he mean this kind of rocker?
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Or this kind?
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He has a pretty girlfriend – a model he met when he played in the Cape Cod League.
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And, according to Joe Girardi, he’ll be “a positive presence inside the clubhouse.”
Maybe he will be, and I’m just being an alarmist. He’s probably a great guy who will make zero errors at first, hit 40 homers and knock in 150 RBIs. I’ll support him 100% because I’m a Yankee fan and it’s my job to support my players. “Let’s go Swish-er!” Clap clap clap clap clap clap.
And yet… I still want him.
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22 comments

  1. levelboss

    i think Swisher should get along well with Johnny Damon (i read that Johnny brings his karaoke machine with him the the clubhouse)

    will the Yankees have enough money to go after Texeira if they acquire Sabathia and Burnett-or-Lowe?

  2. Jane Heller

    He has to have a better year than last year, Kaybee. Has to!

    A young Piazza? I wish, Prince.

    Swisher said in the conference call today that he’s known Damon for a couple of years, levelboss, so maybe they’ll be clubhouse buddies. I doubt there’s enough in the vault for two FA pitchers and Teixeira, but I won’t stop hoping until Tex re-signs with the Angels.

  3. levelboss

    maybe Sabathia will turn down the Yankees’ jinormous offer, and then the Yankees might throw that money at Texeira, ya?

  4. Jane Heller

    I can’t see CC turning down the Yankees’ offer. But it’s less clear we’ll sign the other pitchers. In that case maybe there’s $ for Tex. It just seems like the focus is on pitching, pitching, pitching.

  5. levelboss

    Jane, do you think you and hubby would make a trip to NYC next year to check out the new stadium? maybe you’d get to see Sabathia pitch and Texeira whack a homerun

  6. hseely@twcny.rr.com

    She-Fan,

    Think of it this way: At least he doesn’t finish off every sentence with the word “Dude.”

    Know what I mean, dude?

    El Dudeque

  7. radhamesgo@hotmail.com

    Maybe if Swish can grow a Giambi ‘stache it’ll help bring up his average lol Hopefully Girardi can help him see the light and get some decent production out of him. I think the pitched staff will just be happy to havea defensive first baseman.

    Nice pics Jane

  8. Jane Heller

    I like the picture, too, Polanco. Swish has that “Why I’m gonna beat you silly” look.

    We’re planning to come to games at the new Stadium, levelboss. Just not in the luxury suites.

    El Dudeque. Good one, man.

    Do you really think you’ll get Tex, Steve? You already have MVP Pedroia, who should now be able to play first base as well as second – in the same game. Seriously, congratulations to you and other Sox fans.

    I don’t think there’s even a question that Swish will grow a ‘stache, Rad. It’ll be in full view by spring training.

    Glad you liked my belated homage to A.P., Jeff. I wish I had an MVP to brag about.

  9. thegoodofthegame

    Oh no! Swisher’s not a superstar! Heaven forbid they sign a role player or two and not another mega-free agent! (How’s that for a hyphen?)

    Last season the Phils signed Pedro Feliz (not a superstar) who was gold-glove worthy at third base for us. At the deadline they traded for Matt Stairs (not a superstar) who hit a John Kruk-ian style homer to win game 4 of the NLCS, and Joe Blanton (not a superstar) who became just the 17th pitcher to blast an homer in the world series and almost single-handedly shut down the Ray’s potent offense.

    It takes a team to win a world series. The Yankees are not a team.

    Just because he doesn’t slug .600 from both sides of the plate doesn’t mean he’s not useful.

    I know you wanted the Hummer for Christmas, but the good ol’ Chevy Trailblazer might still be running come playoff time.

    ~ http://thegoodofthegame.mlblogs.com

  10. jimmy27nyy

    Hey, Jane …

    Well, overall, I do think it was a good move by the Yankees to trade for Nick Swisher … But, I envision Swisher as a perfect player off the bench; not our starting first baseman !!! … The Yankees will be a much better team with Mark Teixeira as our starting first baseman, and Nick Swisher as a role player, filling-in at: 1B; OF; PH; and DH, when needed … Money should not be an issue in any deal the Yanks are considering; and, the Yankees should pay whatever it takes to bring Tex to the Bronx … Like you said, Jane, “the Yankees do not need another [hyphen] first baseman such as Swisher … Signing Mark Tex will solidify our first base situation for at least the next seven years … So, I hold out hope that the Yankees will sign Tex sometime “soon” !!! … Take care, Jane !!! … Jimmy [27NYY]

    http://baseballtheyankeesandlife.mlblogs.com/

  11. Jane Heller

    Hey, Jimmy. Maybe if you and I keep championing the signing of Teixeira loudly enough, Brian Cashman will hear us! I’m keeping the faith.

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