Tagged: Rogers Centre

There Was Only One Thing To Do After This One

CHAMPAGNE.nose job.jpg
Celebrate. Uh-huh. 
Getting into the postseason is no small feat, and, like the Yankees, I decided not to let the occasion go by with merely a “Yay.” After watching the players douse each other in the visitors clubhouse at the Rogers Centre (I don’t get the post-game show here, so I had to wait for the party clips on the YES web site), Michael covered the shower wall with plastic so it would look “authentic” (a Hefty garbage bag like last year), escorted me inside, dumped champagne on my head and handed me the rest of the bottle. It wasn’t the good stuff and tasted like stale beer, but the sentiment was there even if I did end up looking like Alice Cooper. Woohoo, Yankeeeeeeees!
CC was The Man. He gave the team innings. He gave them effectiveness. He gave them the confidence to score runs. (Loved all the sac flies.) He gave them a true ace. And Mo. Well. Of course he wrapped it up. I know the division title is still up for grabs, but just knowing for sure that we’ll be watching October baseball is a thrill that never gets old. I thought back to 2007 when I was following the Yanks around the country for the She-Fan book. We were in Tampa, at the Trop, when they clinched their Wild Card berth and the Post’s Charles Wenzelberg promised he’d bring me back a champagne cork from the party. True to his word, he brought me the cork when we were in Cleveland for the ALDS. I still have it.
I keep it with my jewelry. To me, having a memento from a Yankees celebration is more valuable than diamonds or pearls.

Yanks Beat Anthony Michael Hall 5-3

Some people said it would be nearly impossible for the Yankees to get a win at the Rogers Centre, given that the formidable Roy Halladay would be on the mound. (I was one of those people.) But it happened. The Yanks scored five runs off him, including homers by Damon, Tex and Matsui, and although he threw a complete game, he went to the showers a loser. Now come comparisons between the former Cy Young award winner…

…and the former teen movie idol and “Breakfast Club” star Anthony Michael Hall.
(OK, they look more alike since Roy shaved off his beard. Thanks to Yankeemeg for the heads up.)
Andy Pettitte was terrific over his six-plus. And while Hughes is no longer the Scoreless Wonder in relief and Mo looked a little shaky (memo to Girardi: stop dragging him into games in the eighth inning; he gets tired in August), the defense was impressive (clap clap clap for Melky’s running grab of Wells’ fly ball in the seventh, as well as some pretty snappy double plays started by A-Rod and Tex). All in all, this was a fun game to watch. It moved right along, as pitcher’s duels do, and kept me riveted. These two look glued to the action, don’t they?
Everybody was all huggy and kissy at the end, just the way I like it.
My question is: Can the Yankees do it again on Wednesday night with Sergio Mitre getting the nod?
Sergio Mitre.jpg
I’m nervous about this one. So I figured I’d better come up with more strategies to help the Yankees pull off a “W.” Once again, I analyzed video.
Here are my recommendations to Sergio based on his responses.
#1) Since you said that the NL is easier because the ninth batter is the pitcher, pretend the Jays’ ninth batter, Bautista, is the pitcher. And try not to let your eyes cross when you see the pitcher’s name. It’s Marc Rzepczynski. Only two vowels. Seriously.

#2) You compared your sinker to Wang’s, but said he throws a little harder than you do. He won 19 games twice before he got injured. What are you waiting for? Throw harder.
#3) You admitted that you were over-hyped for your first start, because the fans at Yankee Stadium were so loud and excited. What’s your excuse after your last start, which was in Chicago? Wear earplugs if the crowd noise is bothering you.

#4) You had Tommy John surgery, which is practically like having your arm replaced. You’re bionic, dude. Act like it.
#5) You talked about the Yankees offense being there behind you. If you want them behind you in Toronto, you need to smile at them a little. You’re way too serious. Spend some time with the Melkman and lighten up.
#6) You told the interviewer your goal is to stay healthy. How about trying some of this?
Oopsie. You already did, and it cost you 50 games. Maybe One-A-Day would work just as well?
My final words to you, Sergio, are these: “Get people out.” I hope you hear them. Good luck.

She-Fan Exclusive: How The Yanks Can Beat Halladay

It’s back to baseball on Tuesday night, as the Yankees will face Roy “I’m so glad the trade stuff is over” Halladay at the Rogers Centre. Clearly, he’s a formidable pitcher, but the Yanks have only a half-game lead in the division and need the victory. So I decided to analyze video of Doc and come up with fool-proof ways to beat him – strategies I’m fairly sure that Girardi and his coaches haven’t thought of.
Here’s the footage….
…and my strategies.
#1) Turn him around and make him pitch left handed.
Why not? He’s a righty. Take him out of his comfort zone from the get-go. If Andy Pettitte can throw left handed, why can’t Halladay?
#2) Infiltrate the Blue Jays’ laundry department and shrink Doc’s pants.
When he brings his left leg up to his chest during his windup, the pants will split open and he’ll have to bolt for the clubhouse to get another pair, thereby interrupting his rhythm.
#3) Ask AJ Burnett to reveal Halladay’s most hated song and make sure it’s played during his warmup.

This will not only distract him, but possibly make him snap if the singer is irritating enough.
#4) Get Halladay’s wife to nag him between innings.
Since he’s notoriously strict about not speaking to anyone before or during his starts, having his wife nag him about putting the cap on the toothpaste, emptying the dishwasher and taking out the garbage should infuriate him.
nagging wife-saidaonline.jpg
#5) Someone must charge the mound.
No, not to throw a punch. Simply to look menacing if Roy comes in remotely high and tight, the way good old Richie Sexson looks here. Maybe Doc scares easily.
Those are my suggestions. There are others, of course. The Yankees could trash talk Roy from the dugout and see if he cries. Or they could pay the Blue Jays’ clubhouse attendant to deprive him of sunflower seeds. But the important thing is that the Yankees must use any means necessary to win this game. Any. Means. Necessary.

Preparing Teixeira For Game 2 Vs. The O’s

I’m assuming that after Mark Teixeira struggled at the plate on Monday, he watched video of his performance with hitting instructor Kevin Long and searched for any possible mechanical malfunctions in his swing.

But maybe there was more to the story. My theory is that Jeter and Girardi put their heads together during the game to try and figure out what was bothering their new first baseman.


“I think it’s opening day butterflies,” said Girardi.
“I think it’s all those fans booing him,” said Jeter.
“What should we do about it?” asked the manager.
Jeter smiled knowingly, motioned for the clubhouse attendant and disappeared into the dugout.
After the game, Derek took Tex aside and sat him down in the players’ lounge.
“Have a look at this and you won’t be intimidated by the fans here,” said Jeet. “Seriously. They can’t even sing.”
Speaking of fans, the Blue Jays announced that they have banned alcohol at the Rogers Centre for three games after drunken and disorderly spectators threw various items onto the field during Monday’s opener against the Tigers.
It turns out the Rogers Centre has had its share of disorderly conduct, including this little episode last year.
Isn’t there enough happening during a game to entertain people? I’ve never understood the appeal of streaking or batting around a beach ball or even doing the wave. Am I missing something?

Like CC Sabathia, I Lack “Feel”

In the Yankees’ 7-4 loss to the Tigers today, CC had a five-run meltdown in the second inning and was pulled. After the game, he said he lacked feel but was confident he’d find it. He looks confident, doesn’t he? He’ll be fine. Better than fine.
But what about me? I lack feel as a fan, and I don’t know if I’ll ever find it. I’m speaking of my feel, not for the Yankees, but for the WBC, the tournament I’m supposed to care passionately about but do not. Right this minute, for instance, I’m watching Team USA against Venezuela and I can’t keep my eyes open. In other words, I should be exhibiting the enthusiasm of this fan.
And instead, I’m exhibiting the stupor of this woman.
Perhaps it’s the announcers, who are congenial enough but don’t convey a sense of urgency about the proceedings. Maybe it’s the fact that the Rogers Centre is practically empty and you can hear every whistle and catcall. Or maybe it’s simply that the game has all the thrills of an All-Star event – i.e. I’m not invested in the outcome.
Of course, I love seeing Jeter.
But that’s because he’s a Yankee. The truth is I’d rather be watching him at spring training in Tampa with other Yankees, not galavanting around North America with Dustin Pedroia. I mean, it’s very sweet that they’re bonding, but the person he should be bonding with is this guy.
Tex has been with the team for two minutes. It would be nice if the Captain got to know him before the season starts.
I know what you’re thinking: I’m a complete whiner.
I just want to see the Yankees. That’s all. I think it’s great that the team from the Netherlands has advanced, and other heartwarming stories abound. But I have a one-track mind. I do. It’s the Yankees or nothing for me.

A Meaningless Game That Meant Something

Yeah, it did. Phil Hughes proved he can throw eight strong innings without fracturing a rib. Abreu showed he can slug a grand slam after going 0-for-4 against A.J. Burnett. And Xavier the Savior demonstrated his versatility at the plate by driving in two runs with a regular old single – i.e. he didn’t swing for the fences. And the Yankees beat the Jays in 10 innings! That makes seven straight wins for a team that’s already been eliminated! Yay!

O.K. So I’m going a little bit overboard. Hardly anybody was at the Rogers Centre tonight (you could hear what every drunk was yelling), and the real action was in cities with teams that are still fighting for a playoff spot. So what? I enjoyed myself! Girardi used Gardner, Miranda, Ransom, and Moeller and it was sort of like watching a spring training game where there’s no pressure. Instead of sitting silently in my chair like a nervous wreck, I made conversation with my husband for a change.
“I like you better when you’re not so uptight,” he said.
See? The game tonight meant something.