I really enjoyed this article in today’s New York Times in which we learn that the Yankees and Major League Baseball have licensed the precise brand of grass that’s used to blanket the field at Yankee Stadium. It’s being marketed at Home Depot as “Yankees Sod.”
That’s right, the Fab Four (not to be confused with the Core Four). Today’s announcement that iTunes would now be making the Beatles’ music available for download was a huge thrill for me, and it took me exactly ten seconds to go on the site and click “Buy” next to all the songs I loved when I was growing up. Yes, I was one of those screaming teenagers who went crazy the first time I saw Paul, John, George and Ringo on “Ed Sullivan.” From then on, I hung their posters in my bedroom, bought their records, went to their movies (I actually saw “A Hard Day’s Night” 11 times and “Help” 13 times), terrorized my parents to let me go to their concerts. I was like the blonde girl in the video below who cries.
(Loved Groucho at the end of that.)
Anyhow, the Beatles were a big part of my childhood and even now when I see Paul McCartney at Yankee Stadium I go a little nuts. So today was a happy one for me and my iPod.
Oh, I guess there was a little Yankees news. Doc Halladay won another Cy Young award. How is that Yankees news? Because in my fantasies, he ended up in the Bronx, not Philadelphia – just like the Beatles came to my house and sang “I Want To Hold Your Hand.”
The first thing I did after reading the article was to rush outside and take a good look at my yard. Were there any brown patches on the lawn that needed to be filled with Yankees Sod?
You bet. The reason? We have a lot of these.
I know. They’re adorable. But they have the appetite of CC Sabathia, and their meal of choice is grass.
I decided to call Home Depot and order some Yankees Sod. Maybe the rabbits are Red Sox fans and won’t eat it.
Then it occurred to me that there should be other everyday products licensed by the Yankees and MLB. For instance, I bet they use a really heavy duty cleaning liquid at the Stadium to get the spilled beer off the seats, not to mention the globs of mustard. So how about a product called Mr. Yankee?
Then there are those push brooms used by the grounds crew to smooth the dirt in the infield. Shouldn’t they be sold as Yankee Sweepers and wouldn’t every Yankee fan want one for around the house?
There’s always plenty of pre-recorded music playing at the ballpark. Surely, someone has thought of creating an iYankeetunes store where we can download “New York, New York” and other favorites onto our iPods?
I’ve always coveted the nifty shirts/aprons worn by those who sell peanuts and cotton candy at the Stadium. So why not Yankee Vendorwear?
The possibilities are endless. But what I’d really like to see the Yankees dabble in is a line of home furnishings. How could I resist putting an authentic Yankees Dugout Bench where my living room couch is now?
Oh. It would require a good scrubbing, wouldn’t it. Fortunately, I’d have Mr. Yankee and the Yankee Sweeper to help get the job done.
At 3 o’clock Pacific Time I won’t be taking a walk on the beach…won’t be on the phone wishing my friends a happy new year….won’t even be cooking a new year’s day meal. I will be tuning in to the debut of what I’m calling “The Baseball Channel.”
Yes, I know it’s got the “M” and the “L” in the name, plus the word “Network.” But let’s face it. It’s The Baseball Channel and it’s going to be all baseball all the time and I can’t wait.
It has the feel of other great launches and historic events, doesn’t it?
Like Henry Ford’s first car.
Or Steve Jobs’ first Apple computer.
Or the world’s first test tube baby.
(Yeah. She’s all grown up now, with a baby of her own.)
It has the excitement of the Space Shuttle lift off….
and the festive atmosphere of New Year’s Eve in Times Square…
and the thrill I’ll feel when the Beatles finally make their music available on iTunes. (What’s the holdup, boys? I’m getting mightily impatient.)
It’ll be one of the great moments in life, on a par with this.
O.K., no it won’t.
But still. I’m stoked. Only three hours to go.