Tagged: Dennis Eckersley

Now We Know: We’re Going To Arlington

But where, exactly, IS Arlington? Yes, I’m aware that it’s in Texas, but where? I figured I’d better check since our boys will be flying there.
OK, so it’s not in the Panhandle. And it’s not near the Mexican border. It’s not even in the vicinity of Austin or Houston or El Paso. It’s kind of close to Texarkana, which is an actual place not a country-and-western song, and is, therefore, practically in Arkansas, home of Cliff Lee, as well as A.J. and Moseley. What’s it like in Arlington? According to Wikipedia…
Arlington is a city in Tarrant CountyTexas within the Dallas-Fort Worth metropolitan area, the seventh-largest city in Texas and the 49th largest city in the United States.[3]

OK, so it’s not that small, and our Yankees will find plenty of places where they can amuse themselves.
Located approximately 12 miles (19 km) east of downtown Fort Worth and 20 miles (32 km) west of downtown Dallas, Arlington is home to the Texas Rangers’ Ballpark in ArlingtonCowboys Stadium, the International Bowling Campus (which houses the United States Bowling CongressInternational Bowling Museum and the International Bowling Hall of Fame), the headquarters for American Mensa, and the theme parks Six Flags Over Texas (the original Six Flags).
Cool. They can go bowling if they need to get away from it all, not to mention hop on a roller coaster.
According to the American Lung Association, Dallas has the 12th highest air pollution among U.S. cities. Much of the air pollution in Dallas and the surrounding area comes from a hazardous materials incineration plant in the small town of Midlothian and from concrete installations in neighbouring Ellis County.

Uh-oh. So they won’t be able to breathe. And the last thing CC needs before he makes his start on Friday night is to be exposed to hazardous materials. He’ll have enough trouble staying away from the BBQ joints. But the real hazard, as far as I’m concerned, is Lee and we don’t have to worry about him for awhile. I was hoping we’d play the Rays and we’re not. So we’ll have to get used to the following:
* Relentless close-ups of Nolan Ryan.
* Vlad Guerrero swinging at balls on the ground, in the air, off the top of his head.
* Replays of Josh Hamilton winning the Home Run Derby.
* Neftali Feliz’s “cheddar,” as David Wells and Dennis Eckersley dubbed his fastball.
The Rangers are an excellent team and I congratulate them for winning their series. But just like the highly anticipated new FOX show “Lone Star,” they should prepare to be cancelled after just a few episodes.
P.S. Now that our opponent is known, it’s a good time to enter the Crumbs cupcakes contest or amend your predictions. Click here for details. The deadline for entering is Thursday at midnight, PT.

Revenge of the She-Fan

OK. Enough is enough. The Red Sox have now beaten the Yankees six times in six games this season, and tonight’s 7-0 shutout at Fenway was the last straw. I’m officially angry, and if I were the Yanks I’d be afraid. Very afraid.

How dare AJ embarrass me like this? I realize that he was going on two extra days rest, but seriously. He couldn’t even get through three innings, never mind the fact that he walked five. He looked as disgusted as I was as he made his exit.
And I was worried about Wang? What a joke.
So we were stuck with Bombko, who gave up a run in the fourth, and Veras, who teed one up for Nick Green in the seventh. Nick Green! Give me a break!
So much for good pitching. And then there was our hitting – or lack thereof. Sure, Beckett was on his game, but he had bouts of wildness – and was the beneficiary of a few sweet strike calls – and yet everybody seemed to be straitjacketed.
The Yanks were up there hacking at the first pitch as if they had a plane to catch. Well, not everybody. Tex did walk twice, and A-Rod worked the counts before succumbing to mediocrity. The truth is, our hitters looked like this tonight.
I mean, two measly singles over nine innings? Did the Bombers somehow mistake this game for a little girls’ dress rehearsal?
Then there was our defense – from Posada’s passed ball in the first to A-Rod’s bobble of Green’s routine grounder in the second. And Swisher made every catch in left an adventure.
Was there a silver lining in the game – something positive to take away? Um…..no.
Well, wait. There was levity if, like me, you were watching NESN. (The Extra Innings package didn’t offer the YES feed.)
Dennis Eckersley, the perenially-tan former pitcher who’s been filling in for Jerry Remy, enjoyed the shot of Papelbon sitting on the bench napping in the seventh inning. “It takes all kinds,” he said.
Back to the game. I feel better now that I’ve unleashed my inner She-Monster. I am no longer mad at the Yankees and am looking forward to tomorrow’s contest. Yes, I’m over it. I just hope the Yanks are over whatever was ailing them tonight.

Small Ball Losers

Actually, what the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim demonstrated tonight against the Red Sox was too-small ball. They couldn’t catch the ball (I’m talking about you, Mr. Blinded-by-the-Lights, Gary Matthews Jr). They couldn’t hit the ball (I’m talking about you, Mr. 0-for-4, Chone Figgins). And they couldn’t run the bases (I’m talking about YOU, Mr. I-Should-Have-Been-Lifted-for-a-Pinch-Runner, Vladie Guerrero).

Oh, Vlad. What happened to you? You used to be so trim and athletic when you were with Montreal.

Then you moved to the Angels and fell for their nachos with cheese, I guess. Now look at you. So porky.

What’s more, you made such a bonehead move, trying to go to third on Hunter’s pop-up. Haven’t you ever seen THIS?
That’s what your coach was telling you to do if you’d bothered to look. Oh, well. The rally monkey doesn’t really have magical powers, does it.
Yes, of course I grudgingly tip my cap to Jon Lester for an outstanding performance. And to Manny Ramirez Jason Bay for driving in those handy runs.
Speaking of Jason, there’s one more thing I’d like to get off my chest tonight. In TBS’s pre-game coverage of Dodgers-Cubs, Dennis Eckersley said on national TV that Manny was a “bad guy” and Bay was a “good guy.” Is that was a color commentator is supposed to do before a major league baseball playoff game? Engage in character assassination?
It’s true that Manny shoved the Red Sox’s traveling secretary and slapped Youkilis in the dugout (or maybe I have these backwards and he shoved Youkilis and slapped the traveling secretary). And far be it from me to stick up for even a former Red Sock. But maybe, Dennis, you shouldn’t be throwing stones. I seem to remember you had “issues” of your own.
And so we move on to Day 2 of the division series tomorrow after the Phillies, Dodgers and Red Sox won their games today. Will the Rays handle the White Sox or vice versa? Honestly? I just wish the Yankees were in it.