Cashman’s Penalty For Not Signing A Left Fielder Yet

While I was in Tampa dancing with Hal Steinbrenner and cheering on the Yankees pitchers in their Chippendale’s debut, I got a tip that Brian Cashman was in town. Apparently, he’d been summoned by the “other brother.” I’m speaking, of course, of Hankenstein.
Hank’s been keeping a low profile lately, but my sources told me he’s been incensed that Cashman hasn’t signed a left fielder yet. And now, with all signs pointing to DeRosa going to the Giants, Cash is really feeling Hank’s wrath. I went back to my hotel, fell asleep and had a horrible nightmare. As you can see below, I dreamed that Hank ate Cash – just swallowed him whole. I woke up hoping for Cash’s sake that we have a new Yankee in LF by New Year’s Day. I really don’t want to lose our GM just because Hank is hungry.



    Hi Jane – Much as Hankenstein ate Cash, I am eating my words today…DeRosa is a Giant. I did find out in the last day or so that he grew up a Met fan…grrr. So, THAT theory is shot!

    The wait continues.

    PS – My personal favorite nickname for I’ve seen for Hankenstein: Yammerin’ Hank. –John

  2. Jane Heller

    Yup, John. No DeRosa. So we can cross him off the list. And according to LoHud, Jermaine Dye was a candidate but is also no longer of interest. Could we end up with Marlon Byrd? I had picked him as a possibility several weeks ago. Yammerin’ Hank doesn’t seem to do much yammerin’ these days. He seems to have receded into the shadows.


    I’m with ya, Scott…this is my current “best-case scenario”. And yes, Yammerin’ Hank has receded into more of a business role…still love the name tho! 🙂

  4. raysrenegade

    Sometimes I see Cashman as that kid who keeps poking the sleeping dog thinking it is so funny to hear his grumbles and geowls, but is all whiny and tear soaked when the dog finally wakes up and eats his nose off.
    For the last few years it seems that sometimes Cashman just teases the big bosses, then in the last second comes out with a bang and signs the guy he should have all along……….I am thinking it is not going to be a name we think of normally…..maybe Gabe Gross or Reed Johnson who both have speed and also a great arm..

    Rays Renegade


    And Jane – you may very well be onto something with Byrd! Also, is the last syllable of Hankenstein pronounced “SHTEEN” (a la Young Frankenstein)? Or is it the more traditional “STINE”? Inquiring minds need to know…LOL.

  6. southernbelle

    Jane: I don’t care how much Holliday costs. THE YANKEES CAN AFFORD IT! They have to get him. They owe that to me. After trading away my favorite-darling-baby-Melky, they need to make it up to me (don’t tell them I was happy we got Javier, lol). Matt Holliday would make me very happy 🙂
    Jane, why don’t you make the monster eat Scott Boras? He’s the reason Damon and Holliday don’t have any offers. Last year Cashman said they weren’t going after Tex, and we got Tex. I hope he’s doing the same thing with Holliday.

  7. Jane Heller

    I don’t think Damon will keep the Yankees within their budget, Scott. That’s the problem – unless, of course, he decides to put himself on the after-Christmas sale rack. I’d love to see him come back though.

    Gabe Gross, Reed Johnson and even Jonny Gomes have all been mentioned as possibilities, Renegade. So have Marlon Byrd and Rick Ankiel. I’m sure Cashman has someone up his sleeve, but he pulled a fast one last year with Teixeira so we never know what he’ll do versus what he says he’ll do!

    I loved the Mel Brooks movie, John, so let’s go with HankenSHTEEN. LOL!

    I wish I could say I thought up the nickname, Paul, but I must have read it somewhere. My originality only extends so far.

    Jeff, I suppose it’s possible the Yankees will put Brett Gardner out there. Maybe Holliday will finally take the Cardinals’ money!

    There was a time when I would have jumped at the chance for Vernon Wells, Jonah. What happened to him? He used to kill the Yankees whenever we faced the Jays. I also thought the Jays would make him part of a package for Halladay, but that didn’t materialize. Oh well.

    I don’t think it would be horrible to have Gardner in left, Ellie, but the Yankees will be losing serious RBI producers in Matsui and Damon. Gardner is a good (not great) defender, but it’s his bat that worries me.

    I think another trade is very possible, Vig, but who do the Yankees give up at this point? Not more prospects. And not Swisher. I’d go the free agent route.

  8. Jane Heller

    Virginia, you’re so right. I should have had the Hankenstein monster eat Boras. Maybe your brother should do that one and put it on YouTube like he did with the teachers. 🙂 You’re right about Tex – Cashman did surprise us with that signing. I guess he could do it again with Holliday or Damon. I just don’t think so.

  9. raysrenegade

    How ironic would it be if Gomes did entertain the idea of coming the NYC.
    At least the Yankee faithful know he has passion and his teammates backs……….(as long as Shelly is not on the team).
    Seriously, he brings great energy to a clubhouse, but I think his focus is still trying to get a chance with Cincy again………..but, money talks.
    And I could not boo him.

    Rays Renegade

  10. Jane Heller

    I agree with you, John. There are still some good names out there and I’m not interested in giving up more prospects/players. The price has to be right though.

    If Gomes came to the Bronx, it wouldn’t be the first time a brawler from another team was welcomed once he put on the pinstripes, Renegade. Jeter and company weren’t very fond of Clemens before he became a Yankee and then they loved him. So you never know. And yes, money talks!

    I’d like to believe Damon will be back, Joe. Boras has had to make concessions before. But now that Bay has been signed, I’m not sure what it means for the other free agents, money wise.

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