My Chat With Amber

A few minutes ago, the Yankees lost to Brett Bombko and the just-out-of-high-school Oakland A’s. The score was 3-0.
I sort of couldn’t believe it. I mean, the Yanks haven’t been shut out since June. I guess this is why it’s good to have a lead in August – so your offense can flail at the ball. (I’m talking to you, A-Rod, since you popped out after Tex doubled in the first and then you grounded into a double play with bases loaded in the third. Pee-euewwwAnd Jorge, Mr. Birthday Boy, your strikeouts didn’t thrill me, either.) 
A.J. pitched really well but got no run support, obviously. My sympathies, guy. You have my permission to throw pie at all your teammates.
The Yankees are entitled to lose a few, sure, but I’d be lying if I said I was fine with it. One loss? Ha ha ha. Two in a row? Mild panic. What will Tuesday night bring? I didn’t want to take any chances. I heard the wives and girlfriends of the players were traveling with the team, so I made a last-minute date with Amber Sabathia to discuss her husband’s start against the A’s. Here’s our conversation. I did what I could. Now let’s see if she holds up her end of the deal.



    I’m a little depressed, Jane. 8/18 is my birthday so technically they lost ON my b’day. Today’s game will end on the 19th but if they get a win I will count it as their present to me. So are we now 7 games over Boston? Its still a good lead but it could disappear very quickly – they guys cannot get complacent, especially heading into Fenway. While you’re chatting with the wives, please talk to the girlfriends as well – especially A-Rod’s. On the upside, we must give all honors and respect to Jeter for his exceptional career — #2 will definitely be retired someday.


    Thanks for making me smile! I guess the ad is true -if you can type, you can make a movie -very cute! Let’s hope this is just a temporary blip and that great playing will pick up again.

  3. junojen

    I was a little concerned there, Jane. I thought the conversation might escalate to a cafeteria smackdown with Mrs. Sabathia – LOL! (BTW my money’s on you… you look like you can run pretty fast.)

    No worries about the Yankees. You will be in Boston at the end of the week and will probably beat up on us again. I see our projected pitchers for the series. Not good (for us).


  4. Jane Heller

    I felt sorry for AJ, AQuist. He really hung in there last night – a very efficient outing even with the bad third inning. Just didn’t get the run support. I don’t know what’s up with the bats, but they really haven’t hit since Thursday night in Seattle. Grrrrr.

    Diane, they lost on my birthday too. (Happy Birthday, btw! I knew it was a special day for your daughter over the weekend, but you didn’t tell us about your own big day!) Maybe your celebration will be tonight. I sure hope so. And yes, Jeter is having a great season. His consistency amazes me.

    A temporary blip, etoubman. That’s all it is. I HOPE!

    You’re lucky, TribeTed. When I watch the Yankees, I’m anything by relaxed – unless they’re up by six or seven runs.

    Yep, they were at the cafeteria, Jeff, and Amber wasn’t happy about it. She’s used to far better places. If only I had her budget. Sigh.

    I thought there might be a smackdown too, Jen, but Amber seemed to calm down after the cookbook idea. LOL. My fear is that the Yankees won’t snap out of their little slump and come into Boston feeling bad about themselves and show it. I’m trying to think positively about that series, but it’s Fenway. Shudders.

  5. 2yankeeboy

    I think I’ll like the Boston series because now the sox are scared of us like we wee of them earlier in the season. BTW you shouldn’t have told her about the cook book idea she has enough money already!

  6. southernbelle

    Jane: No. THIS is the best conversation. I loved it so much, I called my Mom down to see it! She loved it, too! You never EVER fail to cheer me up after a bad game. I promise I will post birthday pictures for you later. I just have to find them 🙂 I wish I was Mrs. Cervelli…..sigh -Virginia

  7. Jane Heller

    I figured I’d give Amber the cookbook idea so she’d make CC do his best tonight, 2yankeeboy. I’ll try anything.

    Haha, Virginia. I hope your mom liked the video as much as you did. Maybe you should do one of these and have a conversation with Cervelli. 🙂

  8. ibleedpinstripes

    All that and she didn’t even invite you to go shopping with the girls… Darnit. Hahaha. Well, Jane, you’ve done it again. Let’s hope that Amber tells her hubby not to take any crap and pitch the game of a lifetime tonight!!! Last night’s game was nauseating at best – where the offense was concerned at least. I’m out for blood tonight. I might just fly to Oakland myself and light some firecrackers under their butts!

    – Lisa

  9. matttan7

    If AJ Burnett throws pies at winners, he can’t throw pies at losers too. I don’t want him to throw a fit, either, it sure was not a good day for the Yankee offense, hopefully they’ll break out of it.

    Matthew Tan

  10. Jane Heller

    Hahahaha, Virginia. I’m picturing you fainting and falling down on top of Cervelli! You crack me up! I used to be the same way, believe me.

    Well, that’s the way to look at things, Bern. Very sensible – and true. I wish the postseason did start tomorrow, except that I’d like the Yankee offense to get hot first. It’s the hot team that wins these short series.

    Thanks, FBC. I like “masterpiece.” LOL.

    She didn’t invite me to go shopping with the girls, Lisa, but I’m glad. I don’t have their budget! I think you should fly to Oakland and light those firecrackers. Either that or use smelling salts.

    I hope you’re right about the Yankees, TC. And maybe school won’t be a drag. You’ll be with your friends, right?

    I was really hoping AJ would get the win last night, Matthew. He pitched well enough to earn it. But, as Andy Pettitte knows all too well, it doesn’t always work that way.

  11. raysrenegade

    Something people are forgetting about this small stretch of the season is that teams like Oakland, Pittsburgh, Baltimore and Washington will be gearing up to toss some small hand-made pipe bombs into the celebration punch of the front runners for the playoffs.
    It is the Season of the Spoilers” right now, with no one safe.
    Until October 3rd, the also-rans will begin to try and get their own sense of revenge on the guys with the power, the pitching, and the energy to get to the postseason.
    Hopefully all of the teams with a short can side-step their traps, but it is a reality most will get blasted at least one game in a series.

    Rays Renegade

  12. Jane Heller

    You’re right about the spoilers, Renegade. They bring their “A” games to the park and play their best, as they should. Now it’s the job of the winning teams to avoid the “traps,” as you correctly term them. I hope the Yankees do blast the A’s and show who’s boss!

  13. heartruss

    Jane, that video was classic Jane. Too funny. You should be a screenwriter.
    Could you believe Tomko??
    Better the Yankees lose now rather than in the playoffs, think of it that way. I am taking it one game at a time. I have decided to put everything in perspective since Kuroda got beaned by that ball. I am now thankful for everything. Oh brother. The Yankees will be back to their usual unbeatable selves today.

  14. Yankees Reality Check

    Jane – these videos crack me up! Good stuff. I hope the offense can put itself back together tonight. I put a lot of effort into staying up for West Coast games (remember, I am 35 going on 85); the least they could do is try to hit the ball, right?

  15. Jane Heller

    I am a screenwriter, Cat! But I don’t think these videos are Hollywood worthy. LOL. Taking it one day at a time is a good way to go. And better to lose now than the playoffs. The trick is GETTING to the playoffs!

    Glad you had a laugh, YRC. And yes, the least the Yankees could do for you is make the games interesting, since you’re staying up late. Some nerve on their part!

    This team does play with a lot of heart, TC. I didn’t feel that way last year, so maybe it’ll mean good things in October.

  16. Erin Kathleen

    Geez, A-Sab sounds awfully classist (that’s a word, right?). I guess I’d probably be an elitist snob if my husband made $20 million a year, too. Although, I have to admit, that cookbook sounds like a really good idea. I’m not nearly as bic as C.C. but I do like to eat.-Erin

  17. Jane Heller

    I did make A-Sab sound pretty snooty, Erin. I’ll have to send her an “I’m sorry” note. But isn’t the cookbook a good idea (if I do say so myself)? I’d buy a copy.

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