“A Chamber of Horrors for the Yankees”

That’s what John Sterling called Fenway last night.

The Yanks’ 4-3 loss to the Red Sox was a horror show of the most painful sort, and even though it’s dreary and soggy in New York right now, I’m feeling upbeat about not having to look at Fenway again for awhile.
Just who were the monsters in the chamber of horrors?
Let’s start with Damon, who inexplicably dropped Ortiz’s routine fly ball
damon-reacts.jpg
and turned into him.
frankenstein.jpg
And then there was Nick Swisher, who couldn’t seem to run the bases like a major leaguer
swisher.boston.jpg
and played the role of Frankenstein’s brother.
frankenstein-1.jpg
After a brilliant, valiant outing by CC, exactly what the Yankees needed, Joe turned the ball over to Aceves, who quickly mangled the situation
aceves.mound.jpg
and served as Frankenstein’s other brother (seen above and below with Jeter and A-Rod).
KarloffasFrankenstein.jpg
Earlier, Melky struck out looking (yeah, he argued, but still) with two men on, and sucked all the life of the proceedings
melky.so.jpg
reminding me of him.
dracula-film1.jpg
And let’s not forget Brett the Jet who may have had success with his speed
brett.wave.jpg
but reminded me of this guy with that ridiculous throw on Lowell’s fly ball in the crucial eighth.
Dracula2.jpg
Oh, well. On to the Subway Series. As I said, at least I won’t have to look at this for a few months.
draculas-castle-01.jpg

34 comments

  1. ooaooa

    Fear not oh she fan, I have figured it all out. I have been complaining about pain all week and now I understand the big picture. The word pain is what its all about.

    We WILL lose ALL 18 games to them this year and then go on to win the World Series. This will be a MLB first and this senerio will cause reverse pain to the Sox Nation everywhere. I feel much better now. I just hope I don’t have to come up with something about the Mets this weekend!

  2. Jane Heller

    You’re right, John. That would be a delightful scenario – an MLB first that will go down in history. LOL! Now we must turn our attention to our crosstown rivals and hope Carlos Beltran drops a ball like Damon did.

  3. redstatebluestate

    With all that newfound pop in his bat, you knew Damon was gonna screw something up eventually. That was a tough one to swallow though. I’m sure, if you leave the house today, you’ll be wearing your death shroud, Jane. What an embarrassment. You must be sick about it.
    –Jeff
    http://redstatebluestate.mlblogs.com/

  4. Jane Heller

    I was sick about it, Jeff. But how long can you stay sick? It’s a new day and a new series. I’m thinking like a ballplayer, right?

    I’m aware of that, Steve. And I’m sure you’re salivating. But a lot can happen between now and – what? – August?

  5. raysrenegade

    At least you finally broke the streak last night.
    Now it is time for your team to focus on the Big Apple challenge and either take the city title or go home.
    This weekend series should make that town’s ears burn with either Mets or Yankee banter all day and night long.
    Should be a burning question as to if the Yankee power machine will also turn up in Citi Field, or if the Mets pitching staff is not as bad as the National League makes them looks after Santana is done with his start.

    It will be fun, fun, fun this weekend

    Rays Renegade

    http://raysrenegade.mlblogs.com

  6. Jane Heller

    We’ll see how much “fun” it is this weekend with the Subway Series, Renegade. If the Yankees do well, it’ll be a grand time. If not…………………

  7. mlbmom

    UGLY…UGLY…UGLY…And I am glad it’s over…I dont have to look at Youk with his wiggley batting stance til August (does he do that to be a distraction or did Goofy teach him to bat as a tot?). I am tired of looking at smiling, happy players in the Boston dugout…blech…Tired of hearing about the Yankees payroll and losing howevermany in a row…blah blah blah….
    Its a new FREAKIN’ day….
    I say…BRING IT ON!!!
    LETS GO YANKEES!!!!

    wHEW….I feel better…thanks for letting me vent….

    Have fun in NY Jane!!

  8. peggy3

    Hey Lady Jane …

    I’m happy to see you arrived safe and sound. I just posted on Subway Squawkers about my feelings with regard to the losses to Boston. I’m an optimist and I take each game as it comes…with 102 games left I think I’ll wait before making a reservation for a bridge jump. We have 10 more games with the Sox in August and September …7 of them in our house since we have played 6 in theirs. Only behind 2 in June …I’ll take it. Heck I remember when we were 14 games out the last week of July …..that turned out pretty good … :o).

    It’s a new day…a new game …AND…I’m hoping for a Series win if not a Sweep against those guys across town. I’ll be at the games tonight and Sunday …GOOOOOOO Yankees !!!

    Enjoy New York ….

    Go Yankees 2009 !!!

  9. Jane Heller

    Girardi loves to bunt, Paul, so he must not have wanted to take the bat out of Jeter’s hands. He was 2-for-2 at that point, wasn’t he? Can’t remember.

    Venting is good for the soul, Wendy. I hope you feel better now!

    A sane approach, Peggy. I like it. Let’s go get the Mets and worry about the rest of the season as it happens.

  10. Kaybee

    Wow those pictures are kind of…scary. haha. It was a really good series for the Red Sox, but obviously not so great for you guys. Don’t worry, though, the next time you face the Red Sox in will be on your own home turf!!
    http://kaybee.mlblogs.com

  11. dschaub@gpo.gov

    Dear Doctor Jane N. Stein,
    Thanx again for making misery into comedy, sort of — how DO you keep finding my fave old flix? Monstrous telepathy! Glad you reached N.Y. safely — wear some garlic and some wolfbane, and maybe we can ward off the Mets Monsters. On second thought, let Michael wear (or eat) the garlic!! At last, Cervelli got to catch — note the difference, anyone? — when the ESPN crawler said it’s now 3-2, two on and no out, I said Goodnight Sweetheart, it’s time to go (and you know she loves them sox)…turned it off, can’t stand it no more. But as Miz Scarlett once said, tomorrow is another day. Hope you brought yer Good Vibes from the left coast, man, ’cause like we need it fer sure…!

  12. Jane Heller

    I’m hoping the next round on our home turf will work out better, Kaybee. It couldn’t be worse!

    Hey, Dave. I made it here in one piece. Yay. I hope I brought good vibes from the west coast too, but I guess we’ll have to wait until tonight to find out.

    Works for me, Jenn. I’m on it!

  13. Jane Heller

    The funny thing about the plane wine, Erin, is that I didn’t drink a drop ON the plane. I had a glass before we took off and went stone sober for five+ hours. I’m trying to be braver. 🙂

  14. dschaub@gpo.gov

    Hey again…
    Ya know, I’ve been meaning to ask: will you let the peeps know when & where you’ll be, out In The Publick Eye, signing books and doin’ that She-Fan Cam Thing? Because I/we have a few Yankee fan friends who live/work downtown who I’d just LOVE to “hook you up” with, i.e. let ’em know who you are and whatcha do/what you’ve done, and heygobuyabook. Since I’m probably the nth person to ask you that question, answer at your convenience…in the meantime, “Meet the Mets/Greet the Mets/Step right up and BEAT the Mets!” And Ballantine is better than Rheingold – OR Schaefer!!

  15. Jane Heller

    Dave, it’s 99% that I’m having a signing at Stan’s Bar across from the Stadium on 6/17 at 3:30-5 before the game. I’d love it if you’d send your Yankee fan friends to say hi. I’ll post about it as soon as I have confirmation, but that’s what we’re working on. Thanks for asking!

  16. Yankees Reality Check

    Yes – the Frankenstein imagery is perfect. The Yankees looked like a bunch of stiffs in Boston! I think you could have also had some fun with a Night of the Living Dead theme. I truly believe that Swisher’s base running could have been attributable to some kind of zombie attack.

    Boston fans are incredibly insufferable. I hope they get tattooed by the Phillies. That would be a delight.

  17. thatbaseballguy

    That error by Johnny Damon was inexusable. I hate it when people drop simple pop ups. Errors are bound to happen now and then but things like that shouldn’t happen.
    -Dillon
    http;//dillonm.mlblogs.com

  18. Jane Heller

    Swisher must have gone zombie on us, YRC. How else to explain his brain cramps? But we have to turn the page and look forward to the game tonight. I’m exhausted already. 🙂

    I’m with you, Dillon. It was so surprising too, because Damon’s been great for us. What can you say?

    I think you’re right, Julia. That did seem to turn the tide.

  19. lenn23

    They need a good eighth inning pitcher most of all. I had forgotten that they had lost five straight games earlier this year because they played so well afterwards. Hopefully, I can forget again until next time for the same reason.

  20. levelboss

    a three game chamber of horrors! but you know what? after all that, the Yankees are still only two games behind first.. perhaps inside of a week the Yankees can be up there at first again.. and lenn23 is right – a solid setup man would definitely help; i’d say the Yankees lost at least 2 games because of that (come on, Bruney! or Hughes!)

  21. Jane Heller

    Len, you hit it on the head. We need an eighth inning guy and we need him now. Tonight’s game against the Mets was glaring evidence in spite of the win.

    I agree, Levelboss. Let’s see how Bruney does when he’s back. I don’t want to get my hopes up, but he did pitch well before he got injured. And Hughes could be a good candidate for the job.

  22. Jane Heller

    We should definitely send Castillo a thank you card, Shelley. I just posted a thank you to him myself. What a wild game. I didn’t realize Mussina was the last Yankees pitcher to beat Boston. Can you convince him to un-retire?

    Greg, I wasn’t there, but it was exciting enough being in New York and watching with my mother, a big Yankee fan. How crazy was that? So unexpected, but I’ll take the win any day, especially after our series at Fenway.

  23. heryankeefandiary

    Hi Jane, I hope your trip is going well. Thanks for your comment on my Diary blog. Yes, it was all to horrid. Your post is great.

    Actually I wrote and attempted to post my first MLBlog on Wednesday night, but I am having SO many problems with posting. The page keeps locking up and I have to shut my browser down and open it again. Thank goodness for autosaves or I would have given up. We’ll see if I can get through it today. I’ll let you know when it gets published.

    Wish me luck!

    ~Vanessa

  24. Jane Heller

    It’s good to be in NY, Vanessa, even though the weather has been crummy. I’m so glad you’re joining the blogging community here, even if it’s been tricky getting started. Occasionally, there are technical glitches, but keep trying and good luck!

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