Me To Angels: “Ha ha ha ha ha ha!”


Let me state right up front that I’m not wild about the Angels. Why?
* Their manager whines a lot.
* The name “Scioscia” is too hard to spell with any consistency and leaves me puzzled.
scrabble letters.JPG
* The team is forever associated with “small ball,” as if they invented the hit-and-run, the bunt and the stolen base. In reality, it’s just that they have some smallish players.
* Mostly, it’s because they’ve beaten the Yankees over and over, always making us look like dead people.
But not tonight. This time the Yanks were the 7-4 victors, and laughter rang out all over the Empire.
AJ was shaky out of the gate, giving up a triple to Figgy (not to be confused with the fruit) and a solo shot to Napoli (not to be confused with the city of Naples or the Italian dessert beloved by Phil Rizzuto). Then he got it together and shut down the red-shirted ones.
(There’s so much red when we play the Angels that my eyes burn.)
What I especially loved about this game was the Yankees’ offense. For the third night in a row, we kept battling back. Down 3-2 in the fourth, Jeter came up with one of his clutch, inside-out singles to right.
Bobby Abreu, whose RBIs I miss but whose immobility in right field I don’t, bobbled the ball, allowing Swisher and Pena to score and put the Yankees ahead.
But it was in the eighth when we really spanked the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.
Cano lined one to right that Abreu might have caught if he’d actually bent over. Posada’s ground-rule double came next, followed by Swisher’s intentional walk (good one, Soscia or Sosha or whatever it is), followed by Melky’s single.
(Poor Gardner. He’s so screwed right now.)
When Pena’s double scored Posada and Swisher, that was it for the Halos. Coke and Mo finished them off and that was that. We beat them. We pitched well and Posada nailed a couple of base runners and the hits came in bunches.
But, of course, it was the Magic Pen that was ultimately responsible for the Yankees’ latest reversal of fortune. I rewarded it after the game by showering it with diamond rings and nestling it in Yankees satin. Nothing’s too good for the Magic Pen at this point. Nothing.
Magic Pen(satin).jpg


  1. scofid

    Keep the pen safe…and HAPPY…and away from Julia! Melky’s single in the 8th was great, but I wish that Mark Teixeira would start hitting. I know that he will and he’s always started slowly, but it’s now May. Let’s turn the page, and start crushing the ball! Sounds like Bobby Abreu is still a little sore about not getting an offer from the Yanks. I also miss his RBI’s, but I still think the Yanks made the right decision…even with Nady’s injury. Go Yanks!


  2. cheshirecat9

    Jane where did you get that picture of the couple spanking their kid? That is funny stuff. Another great game last night. I loved that Jorge threw out two baserunners. Ramiro Pena looks like he has a future with this organization. The Yankees are looking good! I hope you have good security around that pen.

  3. mlbmom

    I think one of the luckiest people (aside from you with Magic Pen) is Brian Cashman and that through no fault of his own. If he had been able to deal Melky to “Small Market No-where” and suddenly Melky started playing like he is now…….Cash would, as we say in the south, have to eat a little crow!! I’m just happy watching him be a clutch hitter in our uniform!!!
    And, be mindful how you taunt the Angels……we still have three games to go with them this weekend…..
    I’m just sayin’

  4. latinyankeerebel

    Hey no love for Mo’ today i see.. LOL
    As I mentioned on facebook last night, you got to see the difference last night of warmed up Mo and a notvery warmed up Mo.
    oohhh I loved last nights result of the Rays vs Suxs game… that’s the type of blowouts I looooooove. Don’t you? LOL

  5. Jane Heller

    Thanks, Cat. It must have been the pen.

    Angels fans delight in having owned the Yankees in recent years, Julia. Now it’s my turn for a day.

    Scott, I hear you on Tex. His early double was nice, but he came up in key situations later in the game and couldn’t get it done and was booed. But now it’s May 1st. No excuses!

    That is classic, Russ. Scocscia (did I get it right?) is a good manager. I’ve just never seen anyone argue so often with the umps.

    Cheshirecat, I was worried about Jorge at first, because it was obvious the Angels were running on him. But he took care of that after nailing them. And I agree about Pena. I knew he had a good glove, but he’s been getting key hits too. Nice surprise.

    Wendy, I take nothing for granted when it comes to the Angels (or any other team), but I couldn’t help rejoicing in last night’s win. We finally beat them! And yeah, Cashman is probably knocking on wood that he didn’t deal Melky for Cameron.

    Jenn, when Abreu was a Yankee I really liked him, even though he did, indeed, “lumber” in right. But last night he looked especially bad out there.

    Glad we brought them back to earth, Orangebird. Sorry they swept the O’s though.

    Latinyankeerebel, a warmed up Mo is definitely better than the other variety. He only gets tougher.

    It’s true, Jeff. We’ve been putty in their hands.

    I would recommend that, Steve. Grab a handful. You never know when they’ll run out of ink.


    Well, that was nice. Beatin’ down the Halos for one nite while Beantown gets beaned…it HAS to be Mr. BP (that’s Ball Point, not Batting Practice, altho’ the similarity is nice). And Hor-hay was gunnin’ em down, silencing Jersey Bob for awhile. Hey — howcum Melky got Bobby Abreu’s old uniform number, anyway? Who really WANTS #53, except a football player (or a Don Drysdale freak)?? You’re so right about all that Angel Red…not a color I prefer when it comes to baseball, thanks — they looked so much better in blue (and even with the silver halo around the top — back in the day!!)

  7. Jane Heller

    They did used to wear blue, Dave. I’d forgotten that. It was in the days of Bo Belinsky. I don’t remember him as a player, but I remember his name – and that he went out with Mamie Van Doren. Yikes, I’m old.

    Three straight wins, Kaybee. I’ll take ’em.


    Mercy sakes, you remember Bo!! Yes, I think his only claim to fame (besides Mamie) was that he threw a no-hitter once, and that was that. He was a wrong-hander, too, like me — but were left-handed Angels even LEGAL then? They really were the LOS ANGELES Angels…with Leon “Daddy Wags” Wagner, Little Albie Pearson (probably shorter than you), Jim Fregosi (a skinny SS, if believable!), and a cast of thousands…but we digress. Back to biz…please keep our hero Mr. Pen tightly capped until you need him, and let’s hope for Splitsville or better this weekend!!

  9. mikeeff

    hey jane–sorry not to have posted much as i’ve been a bit busy- i have been watching the games…i feel like i’m finally starting to get over the disasters in boston. you’re SO right about poor little G. as mlong as melky keeps hitting i guess i won’t be too furious, but since i know he won’t Im have to say i’m upset that girardi hasn’t given the guy a chance. we’ll see what happens on that front. i bet cashman is shopping around anyway…

    please don’t lose that lucky pen!

  10. Jane Heller

    That’s right, Dave! He did throw a no-hitter. And now that I’m thinking about the old Angels, I remember a guy named Rick Reichart who came to the Yankees from Anaheim as the first so-called “bonus baby.” And what do you mean a split this weekend? We’re going for a sweep. (Well, you never know.)

    Interesting notion, Yankees Reality Check. But do I want Jeter for the pen? Or would it be better off with someone who doesn’t travel so much and could provide a stable home life?

  11. cheshirecat9

    Of course we’re going for the sweep. Aiming for a split is aiming for mediocrity. Who are we, the Mets?

  12. Jane Heller

    Hey, Mike. I don’t have a huge amount of confidence in Melky over the long haul, but Gardner’s OBP was just dreadful. He needs to play for sure, but I’m not sure where/how. I do love his speed but…

    Agree totally, Cheshirecat!

  13. taleoftwoleagues

    Unfortunately, our day wasn’t remotely as good as yours.
    Our ace broke down for some reason.

    Funny stuff :p

    I’m not too fond of the angels either, i find them… blah.
    Like a boring blah… you know?

  14. taleoftwoleagues

    Unfortunately, our day wasn’t remotely as good as yours.
    Our ace broke down for some reason.

    Funny stuff :p

    I’m not too fond of the angels either, i find them… blah.
    Like a boring blah… you know?


  15. Jane Heller

    I read about your ace breaking down, Mike. Is he injured? Or did he just have an off night?

  16. whiteyfraud

    So they play with small balls. So what?

    Keep your sexist comments to yourself, lady.

    I always take pity on the less-endowed. Not that there’s anything wrong with it.

    And don’t point that pen at me either.

    Have a torrid weekend, bubbelah.

    (Is it Happy Hour yet? I think it is in London, so wtf?)

  17. heartbeatofthebronx

    Haha excellent work again as always Jane, and I look the scrabble reference. It always feels good to beat a team that owns you like the Angels own us. I hope that we can continue the winning trend tonight and move the winning streak up to 4 games. Take care, and I will talk to you soon!


    It’s completely wrong to say that Gardner wasn’t given a chance. He was given a chance last season and was given a chance when he was named starting CF this season. He just didn’t do anything with it as his numbers indicate. Melky completely outperformed him. Girardi did the right thing by going with the hot bat, keeping Gardner as a starter would have been a huge mistake. Chances are he won’t last to see mid-season and be shipped back to the minors. He has yet to show he belongs in the majors. The only positive about Gardner is that he has speed, but that doesn’t mean a thing if he can’t even get on base. He is nothing more than a # 8 or #9 hitter for the forseeable future. I don’t have faith in Cabrera either, that’s why this team needs another bat for the OF and send GArdner down. He will never develop as a hitter sitting on the bench.

  19. rrrt

    How Abreu actually won a Gold Glove while with the Phillies is beyond me. His defense has always been somewhat questionable, especially if he has to get near the wall. So just tell all the Yankees to hit it to right field! 🙂
    Rants, Raves, and Random Thoughts

  20. Jane Heller

    You have a torrid weekend too, Whitey. Must be hot in Miami, especially with the media circling A-Rod’s high school asking if he ever stole a kid’s pb&j sandwich.

    I’d love a four-game streak, Stephen. I’d love a 170-game streak too.

    True, Yankees Reality Check. But Jeter seems to like brunettes. The pen is a red head.

    Pena’s hit was huge, Letsgoyankees, because it really put the game away and gave us breathing room.

    Our bench is pretty thin right now, Matthew, which is where I miss Nady. Another outfielder with a bat would be great, but I hope they don’t bring up Shelley Duncan. I love the guy and he’s tearing up the minors again, but that’s where he belongs. As for Gardner, I think Girardi has to go with the hot bat, which is Melky.


    You never know, Duncan may actually provide some offense, he couldn’t possibly do worse than Gardner. Gardner will never develop by keeping him on the bench.

  22. Jane Heller

    I can’t imagine how Abreu won a Gold Glove, Sue, unless he was more adventurous in his Phillies days. I hope the Yankees do hit it to right in tonight’s game, because the balls have been flying into the seats on that side of the new stadium.

  23. Jane Heller

    Shelley just doesn’t seem to perform at the major league level, Matthew. I remember the other times he’s come up – nothing. He needs to play every day. So does Gardner.

  24. luckylori

    Jane, Jane, Jane! You shouldn’t be reveling in the Angels’ misfortune right now. I’m the first to admit my nephew’s little league team could give them a run for their money. I know you relish every W against them, but be nice.(But hey…I’ll give you 20 bucks and a couple of thundersticks for that pen!)

  25. Jane Heller

    Lori, your guys are back to murdering us. They’re in the seventh now, and it’s not looking good for the Yankees….or the Magic Pen.

    Erin, maybe I should write about food instead of baseball. I’m disgusted by the game I’m watching right now. Grrrrr.

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