I Think I’m In Love With Hal Steinbrenner


I know, I know. I hardly know Harold Z. Steinbrenner except from seeing him in the occasional photo and from watching video of today’s press conference. But did you hear what he said? Did you? Because when he was asked about bidding on free agents, he uttered the statement, “We’re going after what we need,” and I was absolutely hooked. He even said the word “spend” more than once. How could I not love him? He and I want the same thing out of life: a championship for the New York Yankees. We’re totally compatible.
Naturally, there are issues we have yet to work out. I’m sure he has questions about me and I certainly have some about him.
Like why he looks more like
than he does like
who, by the way, is 12 years older than Hal. What’s up with that?
What does the “Z” in Harold Z. Steinbrenner stand for anyway?
And how did he survive Culver Military Academy, the same college prep/military school that his father and Hank went to? Especially when you consider that the head of the school looks like quite the taskmaster.
O.K. Hal and I may not be compatible in every respect. (I went to a regular old high school.) He shies away from the spotlight and I hog it. He has thick, wavy John Edwards hair and mine is long, blonde and tends to frizz in humidity. He’s a billionaire who jets around keeping an eye on his “holdings” and I’m an impoverished writer toiling away on my computer in the solitude of my office.
But we have the Yankees in common! With a new house to move into soon!
Be still my heart.
I have to say I feel as close to Hal right now as two people can be.
In time I think we’ll be inseparable.
In fact, maybe I’ll fly to Tampa and –
Uh-oh. Here comes my husband! I’d better shut this down right now! Goodbye, Hal. It’s been fun.


  1. Kylie

    Oh, it’s bad when you’ve fallen in love with a Steinbrenner. We might need to find you some therapy.
    It’s okay, though. I have my own impossible relationship with a baseball executive–alas, Theo Epstein, why must you work for my most hated team and yet be so gorgeous? You look like a movie star, not a general manager.
    Kylie — http://kylie.mlblogs.com

  2. radhamesgo@hotmail.com

    lol, you must have really loved George Steinbrenner in your youth, the king of spending in Baseball lol
    This is why you can’t help but love the Yankees, they do whatever it takes to win. If it costs money, then it costs money. I guess this is why ou can’t help but hate them either 🙂
    I just hope they don’t overdo it and spend big bucks on the wrong guys.
    Nice post.

  3. Jane Heller

    Actually, I didn’t love George back in the day. I thought he was a crazy blowhard with all his hirings and firings. I loved the Yankees in spite of George in those days. But as I watch teams like the A’s and Twins and Marlins shed expensive players and deprive their fans of their stars, I’ve come to appreciate the money the Yankees spend to put a competitive team on the field year after year – for the fans. It doesn’t always work out and we’ve seen our share of bad signings, but I’ll take the Yankee Way any time.

  4. Jane Heller

    Yes, we’ve retained the services of Marte, Greg. We needed somebody to try and get Oritz out! Now I’d like to see some spending on those who have yet to wear the pinstripes and whose last names start with S and T.

  5. metmainman

    I’m starrting to like him, too. He is already learning from his father, who I must say has many quotes him self, but my favorite Steinbrenner quote of all time comes from Hank, when Chien-Ming Wang went down with a foot injury while running the bases in an interleague game:

    “My only message is simple. The National League needs to join the 21st century. They need to grow up and join the 21st century. I’ve got my pitchers running the bases, and one of them gets hurt. He’s going to be out. I don’t like that, and it’s about time they address it. That was a rule from the 1800s.”


  6. Jane Heller

    You’re right, metsmainman. That quote was such a Hank-ism and reminded me of his father. Hal doesn’t say insane things. He seems rather rational. So far.

  7. Jane Heller

    You’re getting warmer with the Charlie Roses, Mark. LOL. But I’m still holding out for the kind that come in long white box.

    And yep, Mark the Other, I’m ambitious when it comes to the Yankees. Maybe I should be even more ambitious. I’ll tell Hal to forget the free tix and treat me to one of those luxury boxes they can’t unload.

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